like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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