Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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