Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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