Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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