When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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