Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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