I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize