Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
