so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize