Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
