Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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