So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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