but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
