I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
