My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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