life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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