I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I think a kid would responsible me up
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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