The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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