It's Friday. Sex?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize