Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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