Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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