Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
