a queef is a wish your heart makes.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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