If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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