Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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