Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
