WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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