so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
