do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
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