i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Randomize
