dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize