So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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