i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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