you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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