She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize