Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
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