watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
