I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
