You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
