I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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