I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
The air taste purple.
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