just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
