brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
