If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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