All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
