One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
