Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
