Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
