I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
