I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
