: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I want a musical about memes.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
