After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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