sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
